It's one of those things -- the people who have taken high doses of mushrooms and/or other entheogens understand in a way that people who haven't experienced it themselves (usually, at least) cannot. (The exception being some religious people).
"I was stretching on the bed, when suddenly I felt a presence, and the ceiling above me began to swirl with an orange-blue light, like clouds but not exactly like clouds, like mesh, but not quite, like a fire, but not a fire, like electricity, but not really."
I saw the exact same thing in a moment of abject sadness. I was consulting a - legitimate - shaman at the time. She told me that what I had seen was... me. Funny, because I would never had thought of that myself. To be clear, I never take *any* kind of drug.
This is one of the possibilities I'm going to explore in part two -- that it was a manifestation of my guilt or my mind's way of motivating me etc. If it is a real spirit, I definitely don't think psychedelics are necessary for everyone to see it (maybe for me, though).
Interesting journey -- especially the part about how the mushrooms were telling you what to put in the tea (allegedly the plants told the Amazonians how to make ayahuasca). I've got an essay that might shed some light on the theological/spiritual aspects of your journey, if you're interested: https://zworld.substack.com/p/what-are-you
I just finished reading it -- very interesting! I actually had a similar "insight" (so to speak) the same night I got freaked out about getting too thin. At one point before that happened I was in the shower and started crying, because I realized that trapped inside our heads were fragments of one being, isolated. And so we think we're alone.
Yes, I've heard that about the Amazonians! I believe it. It's a very odd experience. I later did a bunch of research to justify my tea recipe, and it really did turn out that every single ingredient I put in was doing something of significance. I've since become far more knowledgable about medicinal plants, but back then I was pretty ignorant.
As soon as you mentioned that reality is fractal, I thought of Kabbalah, and this humorous but deep novel I'm rereading that also briefly touches on LSD and peyote:
Good piece. Interesting how there are people you think will fulfill a certain role in your life who end up filling another. You might not have connected with your husband or at least not in the same way if not for the guy before him. Not everyone at the beginning of the trip makes it to the end but we might not have gotten there without them. A certain magical archetype there to serve a role and then exit.
"Sam" is pretty great. We actually stayed friends and even hung out a few times after I got together with Zach. He definitely helped me a lot, and, yes, I can't imagine things would have gone the same way with Zach if he hadn't introduced me to mushrooms first.
Meghan, I don't know if you are aware of this or not, but psychedelics open you up to demon oppression/possession/ infestation. Yoga is also in this class and it is very dangerous to your eternal soul/spirit to engage in these activities. All of these New Age practices give you the idea that you are going to reach some completeness and get the answers you always wanted but they never deliver. Only Jesus can give you what you seek, but you must seek Him first. He is not the New Age Jesus guru you have mentioned, but the actual Messiah of the Bible and only He can save you.
This is a book I highly recommend you read (an easy read) written by a woman who has been where you have been and is now saved, healed, and delivered.
Not sure about "demons" but part two of this essay will discuss possession and dark spirits (which I guess you could call "demons"?), because I agree with you, they can come when you use psychedelics and they can be pretty scary. I'm also going to discuss how I've come to realize I need to form a spiritual connection to Elohim without using plant medicines or drugs.
You are a trip. Meghan. I just finished the essay. :-)
My sense of God is the same as you describe. I grew up in an atheistic culture, and it took me many years to get to this point. It's a very good place to be.
And yes, I think there are "demons" or hostile entities "out there," and it's good to have protective shields. I too find Jesus to be such. There are probably others out there, in other parts of the world. But it's important to find such a shield...
Some Christians argue that Jesus is the only one. But God never leaves only one path open, with most of the world having no way of knowing about it. In fact, more and more, I see the 'One Truth, One Way, Ours' people as having fallen for a demonic idea. Yet another way to turn God into an idol...
Many Indigenous groups in the Americas believe that burning sage and/or palo santo can ward off dark and unwanted spirits ... as I'll describe in part two, I've found this works.
One of the ways I've conceptualized the dark spirits thing is that they can arise from bacteria (etc) of unclean spaces, which form a "microbiome" that gives rise to a spirit. In other words, mushrooms have made me way more diligent about cleaning my house.
Sage and Palo Santo attract dark spirits as do dream catchers. There are many doors one can open into the occult and those two certainly qualify. Other ways are psychic mediums, yoga, Tarot, astrology, Reiki, etc. The Book of Deuteronomy also warns against this.
Deuteronomy contains strong warnings against occult practices. Specifically, Deuteronomy 18:9-14 forbids Israelites from engaging in practices such as divination, witchcraft, sorcery, and consulting mediums or spirits. This passage emphasizes that these practices are detestable to the Lord and that those who engage in them will be cursed. Additionally, Deuteronomy 7:25-26 commands the destruction of objects used in cult and occult practices, as they represent Satan and bring curses. These warnings are part of a broader biblical stance against the occult, which includes various forms of divination, magic, and communication with the dead.
Jesus is not " such a shield", nor a "demonic idea", He IS the only way, He said it Himself in John 14:6 "I am the way, the truth, and the life, no one gets to the Father except through me". Many have found this out the hard way through NDE's and visions. Believing that there is another way to God is a false idol worship in itself.
So are you saying that God set things up in such a way that this "one way" was known to a few people in first century Holy Land and not known by anyone else anywhere in the world? So the vast vast (99.999999%) part of humanity had no access?
Assuming there is one Great Spirit / God / Elohim (who is both singular and plural, masculine and feminine), it makes little sense to me that He (not implying God is only male by this pronoun choice) would only reveal Himself to Abraham 4,000 years ago when humans have been around for far longer than that, and to no one else. I have a lot more on this coming in what will probably be part three (writing is slow because of baby #2 and because I'm reviewing some books and reading some new ones for it), but I'm going to present the argument that monotheism was the original religion, and that one of the reasons Christian missionaries had such an easy time converting Indigenous peoples around the globe was that many already worshipped the same God, and they recognized that from the Torah stories.
What do you think those first century apostles were doing? They were spreading the good news to the world just as they were told to do. The great commission has been given to all believers in Christ, and the Word of God (the Bible) is now available to all. Missionaries have even had to smuggle them into hostile nations over the years. He will make sure His message reaches all people at some time in their life. Of course one can choose to ignore His message, we all have free will because He loves us and will not force Himself on us, it is a choice.
So you have no answer, for all those people living for 2000 years who did not have access to this supposedly "One and Only Way." No regard for them. Just... well, hey, the missionaries will show up in a thousand years, what's the problem? Gah. What sort of a god is this, that you believe in? Why paint him in such unpleasant colors? The loving God, as I understand him, provides a way for all his children, not just a privileged few. Always did. Always will.
Listen to the Good News that Jesus brought... the kingdom of God is within reach. Here and now. Then and now. The joy of it! :-) hug
Not just scary, they can inhabit and torment you. Jesus is the only way out of it. Please get the book I recommended, her story is similar to yours. God did in fact make only one path to Him, His Son. He will reveal Himself to everyone on this planet at some time in their life. Many Muslims are now having visions and dreams of Him which leads to their complete conversion. Reading His Word, most importantly the New Testament, is the way to Him without using plant medicines or drugs.
John 14:6 quotes Jesus " I am the way, the truth, and the life, no one comes to the Father except through me".
As a Christian I completley agree with you 100%. It sounds either like a break from a reality or an interaction with the demonic, as we both know recreational drug use is a violation of the 5th commandment.
Megan
Thanks for sharing
My choice to use Shrooms came late in life
I am a Grandfather of 5 and retired from being a working man
I meet with other men
And do cold water immersion and saunas
Before taking shroom tea
We always focus on intent
My experience and feelings are similar to yours
The geometry of life
From the infinite to the infinitesimal the fractal patterns repeat
The mandala present every
I hear the music of what happens and it brings calmness and awareness of harmony
Tusen Takk
Jon
It's one of those things -- the people who have taken high doses of mushrooms and/or other entheogens understand in a way that people who haven't experienced it themselves (usually, at least) cannot. (The exception being some religious people).
"I was stretching on the bed, when suddenly I felt a presence, and the ceiling above me began to swirl with an orange-blue light, like clouds but not exactly like clouds, like mesh, but not quite, like a fire, but not a fire, like electricity, but not really."
I saw the exact same thing in a moment of abject sadness. I was consulting a - legitimate - shaman at the time. She told me that what I had seen was... me. Funny, because I would never had thought of that myself. To be clear, I never take *any* kind of drug.
This is one of the possibilities I'm going to explore in part two -- that it was a manifestation of my guilt or my mind's way of motivating me etc. If it is a real spirit, I definitely don't think psychedelics are necessary for everyone to see it (maybe for me, though).
Interesting journey -- especially the part about how the mushrooms were telling you what to put in the tea (allegedly the plants told the Amazonians how to make ayahuasca). I've got an essay that might shed some light on the theological/spiritual aspects of your journey, if you're interested: https://zworld.substack.com/p/what-are-you
I just finished reading it -- very interesting! I actually had a similar "insight" (so to speak) the same night I got freaked out about getting too thin. At one point before that happened I was in the shower and started crying, because I realized that trapped inside our heads were fragments of one being, isolated. And so we think we're alone.
Yes, I've heard that about the Amazonians! I believe it. It's a very odd experience. I later did a bunch of research to justify my tea recipe, and it really did turn out that every single ingredient I put in was doing something of significance. I've since become far more knowledgable about medicinal plants, but back then I was pretty ignorant.
I suspect that we’re the fragments, looking to be made whole.
Beautiful retelling of a beautiful trip.
Absolutely loved this article!
Thank you <3 I hope you like parts 2 and 3 because this, really, is just the set-up / back story.
Looking forward to them!
As soon as you mentioned that reality is fractal, I thought of Kabbalah, and this humorous but deep novel I'm rereading that also briefly touches on LSD and peyote:
https://unsongbook.com/
Haha, I'll try to find time to check it out! It sounds interesting.
My husband is interested in Kabbalah and shares stuff with me, but I'm pretty ignorant about it, sadly.
This chapter (no spoilers) is a hilarious introduction to Kabbalah.
https://unsongbook.com/interlude-%d7%95-theres-a-hole-in-my-bucket/
Oh, wow. That was really entertaining.
Good piece. Interesting how there are people you think will fulfill a certain role in your life who end up filling another. You might not have connected with your husband or at least not in the same way if not for the guy before him. Not everyone at the beginning of the trip makes it to the end but we might not have gotten there without them. A certain magical archetype there to serve a role and then exit.
"Sam" is pretty great. We actually stayed friends and even hung out a few times after I got together with Zach. He definitely helped me a lot, and, yes, I can't imagine things would have gone the same way with Zach if he hadn't introduced me to mushrooms first.
Meghan, I don't know if you are aware of this or not, but psychedelics open you up to demon oppression/possession/ infestation. Yoga is also in this class and it is very dangerous to your eternal soul/spirit to engage in these activities. All of these New Age practices give you the idea that you are going to reach some completeness and get the answers you always wanted but they never deliver. Only Jesus can give you what you seek, but you must seek Him first. He is not the New Age Jesus guru you have mentioned, but the actual Messiah of the Bible and only He can save you.
This is a book I highly recommend you read (an easy read) written by a woman who has been where you have been and is now saved, healed, and delivered.
https://www.amazon.com/New-Age-Christianity-Deceptions-Spiritual/dp/1088099238/ref=sr_1_1?sr=8-1
Not sure about "demons" but part two of this essay will discuss possession and dark spirits (which I guess you could call "demons"?), because I agree with you, they can come when you use psychedelics and they can be pretty scary. I'm also going to discuss how I've come to realize I need to form a spiritual connection to Elohim without using plant medicines or drugs.
You are a trip. Meghan. I just finished the essay. :-)
My sense of God is the same as you describe. I grew up in an atheistic culture, and it took me many years to get to this point. It's a very good place to be.
And yes, I think there are "demons" or hostile entities "out there," and it's good to have protective shields. I too find Jesus to be such. There are probably others out there, in other parts of the world. But it's important to find such a shield...
Some Christians argue that Jesus is the only one. But God never leaves only one path open, with most of the world having no way of knowing about it. In fact, more and more, I see the 'One Truth, One Way, Ours' people as having fallen for a demonic idea. Yet another way to turn God into an idol...
Hugs.
Many Indigenous groups in the Americas believe that burning sage and/or palo santo can ward off dark and unwanted spirits ... as I'll describe in part two, I've found this works.
One of the ways I've conceptualized the dark spirits thing is that they can arise from bacteria (etc) of unclean spaces, which form a "microbiome" that gives rise to a spirit. In other words, mushrooms have made me way more diligent about cleaning my house.
Related, if you want to stick to what's scientifically-proven, sage and palo santo have been found to clean the air of bacteria etc.
Do I want to stick to what's scientifically proven? Hah. That opens a can of worms... :-)
Sage and Palo Santo attract dark spirits as do dream catchers. There are many doors one can open into the occult and those two certainly qualify. Other ways are psychic mediums, yoga, Tarot, astrology, Reiki, etc. The Book of Deuteronomy also warns against this.
Deuteronomy contains strong warnings against occult practices. Specifically, Deuteronomy 18:9-14 forbids Israelites from engaging in practices such as divination, witchcraft, sorcery, and consulting mediums or spirits. This passage emphasizes that these practices are detestable to the Lord and that those who engage in them will be cursed. Additionally, Deuteronomy 7:25-26 commands the destruction of objects used in cult and occult practices, as they represent Satan and bring curses. These warnings are part of a broader biblical stance against the occult, which includes various forms of divination, magic, and communication with the dead.
Jesus is not " such a shield", nor a "demonic idea", He IS the only way, He said it Himself in John 14:6 "I am the way, the truth, and the life, no one gets to the Father except through me". Many have found this out the hard way through NDE's and visions. Believing that there is another way to God is a false idol worship in itself.
So are you saying that God set things up in such a way that this "one way" was known to a few people in first century Holy Land and not known by anyone else anywhere in the world? So the vast vast (99.999999%) part of humanity had no access?
Assuming there is one Great Spirit / God / Elohim (who is both singular and plural, masculine and feminine), it makes little sense to me that He (not implying God is only male by this pronoun choice) would only reveal Himself to Abraham 4,000 years ago when humans have been around for far longer than that, and to no one else. I have a lot more on this coming in what will probably be part three (writing is slow because of baby #2 and because I'm reviewing some books and reading some new ones for it), but I'm going to present the argument that monotheism was the original religion, and that one of the reasons Christian missionaries had such an easy time converting Indigenous peoples around the globe was that many already worshipped the same God, and they recognized that from the Torah stories.
That is why He sent His Son into the world. People are converted by His message, not by the Torah stories.
What do you think those first century apostles were doing? They were spreading the good news to the world just as they were told to do. The great commission has been given to all believers in Christ, and the Word of God (the Bible) is now available to all. Missionaries have even had to smuggle them into hostile nations over the years. He will make sure His message reaches all people at some time in their life. Of course one can choose to ignore His message, we all have free will because He loves us and will not force Himself on us, it is a choice.
So you have no answer, for all those people living for 2000 years who did not have access to this supposedly "One and Only Way." No regard for them. Just... well, hey, the missionaries will show up in a thousand years, what's the problem? Gah. What sort of a god is this, that you believe in? Why paint him in such unpleasant colors? The loving God, as I understand him, provides a way for all his children, not just a privileged few. Always did. Always will.
Listen to the Good News that Jesus brought... the kingdom of God is within reach. Here and now. Then and now. The joy of it! :-) hug
Not just scary, they can inhabit and torment you. Jesus is the only way out of it. Please get the book I recommended, her story is similar to yours. God did in fact make only one path to Him, His Son. He will reveal Himself to everyone on this planet at some time in their life. Many Muslims are now having visions and dreams of Him which leads to their complete conversion. Reading His Word, most importantly the New Testament, is the way to Him without using plant medicines or drugs.
John 14:6 quotes Jesus " I am the way, the truth, and the life, no one comes to the Father except through me".
I am praying for you Meghan.
As a Christian I completley agree with you 100%. It sounds either like a break from a reality or an interaction with the demonic, as we both know recreational drug use is a violation of the 5th commandment.
I will say a prayer for their conversion.
It's the demon possession, actually.
It is possible, drug use can be possession.